Things No One Tells You About College Debt

Taking out a $ 200,000 loan may seem like a great idea, but in the end, free money sometimes has a problem. Here are things everyone wants to know before they go into college debt.

2 / twenty-one

Having a lot really sucks

Having a lot really sucks

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I’m sorry to tell you, but all those people who have been telling how amazing college debt is have not been telling the truth.

3 / twenty-one

It is an invention of our collective imagination

It is an invention of our collective imagination

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Sallie Mae customer service representatives won’t tell you this, but we will.

4 / twenty-one

He should be able to pay off most of it by signing a 10-year, $ 300 million deal with the Los Angeles Dodgers.

He should be able to pay off most of it by signing a 10-year, $ 300 million deal with the Los Angeles Dodgers.

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All you have to do now is convince the team that you are worth it.

5 / twenty-one

Humans have the highest amount of college debt

Humans have the highest amount of college debt

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In a distant second, otters have an average student debt of $ 11,000 per capita.

6 / twenty-one

You can never do anything with your life

You can never do anything with your life

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This isn’t exactly loan-related, but it definitely would have been helpful to know before applying for thousands of loans.

7 / twenty-one

You can’t hire an assassin to kill him

You can’t hire an assassin to kill him

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No, you can’t send $ 50,000 worth of cryptocurrency to a hitman on the dark web to solve your little problem.

8 / twenty-one

It is not an aphrodisiac

It is not an aphrodisiac

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People with large student loan debt often mistakenly console themselves with the false idea that they will at least get them to bed.

9 / twenty-one

It means that you are a bad person

It means that you are a bad person

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Not having $ 100,000 saved by the age of 17 reflects poorly on your character and upbringing.

10 / twenty-one

Changing haircuts does not eliminate your loan

Changing haircuts does not eliminate your loan

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Swapping your long layers for a bob or pixie cut doesn’t somehow eliminate the person who got the loan in the first place.

eleven / twenty-one

The advantages of fast casual meals

The advantages of fast casual meals

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Most people don’t know, but if you provide proof of more than $ 300,000 in student loans, Applebee’s will give you a free Dollarita dollar margarita!

12 / twenty-one

Can’t reason with

Can’t reason with

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Student loans are an unstoppable and overwhelming force of nature that cannot be stopped by pleading with logic or mercy.

13 / twenty-one

Your college gym membership ends as soon as you graduate

Your college gym membership ends as soon as you graduate

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You would think that for so much money you would have a lifetime membership in the University Gymnasium, but no.

14 / twenty-one

All the money you owe goes to feed the hungry

All the money you owe goes to feed the hungry

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I bet you feel a little bad about not paying that debt sooner.

You can haggle

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If you are an expert in the art of negotiation, you can argue until your sum is reduced to a debt that you can pay with corn, wheat, or well-fed pigs.

Smells like sulfur

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The longer you take to pay off your student loans, the longer you’ll emit a putrid, rotten-egg odor from every pore on your body.

17 / twenty-one

Default on your loans will result in the revocation of your knowledge

Default on your loans will result in the revocation of your knowledge

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If you don’t make your payments, Psych 103 will be garnished.

18 / twenty-one

Student loan debt keeps you from doing a lot of things that you weren’t going to do anyway

Student loan debt keeps you from doing a lot of things that you weren’t going to do anyway

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Getting married, owning a car, owning a home – these are things that never interested you and are now not available at all.

19 / twenty-one

Can be repaid in a lump sum or over the course of multiple lifetimes

Can be repaid in a lump sum or over the course of multiple lifetimes

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Whatever is easiest for your current budget.

twenty / twenty-one

The president could cancel the $ 1.5 trillion with the stroke of a pen with no impact on spending or inflation

The president could cancel the $ 1.5 trillion with the stroke of a pen with no impact on spending or inflation

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Somehow the most screwed up part of all.

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